The Great Theft of Balor

Author: Balor

Title: The Great Theft Of Balor




&lt;This is the first in hopefully many of Balor's adventurers If you enjoy I will most definitley add more. <!-- s --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_biggrin.gif" alt="Very Happy" title="Very Happy" /><!-- s --> Thanks!&gt;




It was to be just another normal day in the life of Balor the dwarven adventurer. A day of ale, elven maidens and piles of treasure. Little did he know?

[b:01363]1[/b:01363]


He let out a monstrous yawn as he stretched his small stump body out of the large red bed he had woke in.
He knew from the beautiful aura of the bed sheets and the unmistakable pink marble floor tiles that he was in the Wayfarers Lodging of New Verden. How he adored that small rural town. He had grown up there and even though he had to come to age and had received the gatehouse permit to travel the other lands of Wyvern, he just never got around to leave his cosy little hometown on many occasions.

He couldn?t remember a thing from last night. But he knew from his splitting headache and the unbearable stench of his breath that he had visited ?The Hanging Half-Orc Tavern? sometime during the evening. After a few minutes of sitting down on the side of the bed he finally got the urge to pull himself on to his feet, and put on his armour. As a natural duty, he double-checked his bag to make sure all was in place and not stolen by some mischievous Halfling. He had a hate for those wretched creatures?. He was then reassured of his visit to the local tavern last night with emptiness of his purse.

Balor was a grumpy dwarf. Especially for a shortbeard. He had a despise for most walks of life but of all the things he hated, thieves were one of them. In fact he probably hated them the most. Balor was a warrior. A believer of honour he thought any creature who couldn?t kill an opponent for his goods was a coward.

Balor lead his life by a philosophy his late human step father used all his life;

?I?d rather spend me coins on drink, women or some fancy robe than have it stolen by some rotten little thief?

His step-father was a blacksmith by trade, and a philosopher by nature. Balor modelled his entire code of life on the sayings of ol? Shawnee Blackhands. He was quite the axe man too, and was a regular in the local?.

After he had his pack checked, and his armour on, it was time to wake ?Cassie?. He looked under the bed and there she was? sleeping in tranquillity?. She looked thirsty. Balor smiled. He picked her up, got the grip right, and walked out the door and onto the parquet floor of the hallway? He noticed a crack or two developing on a few of the brown tiles. But the Wayfarers Lodging had been around longer than he could remember, and had done a great service to the townsfolk and the many passers by of the area?.
After Balor was convinced with his gear, he made the final steps to the entrance and preceded to the streets of New Verden.

Balor had decided he would spend the day in Amita when a street cleaner walked up to him
? ?Ello old boy! How?s the monster hunting going then ?ey?? he asked. He was very rough looking and had very few teeth left. Balor was well known in New Verden.
?Good.? he replied blankly. For a dwarf of many rants Balor didn?t talk much while sober.
?well? erm? good luck with that! ?Nd If I catch you littering I?ll-? he didn?t need to finish. The dwarf had already nodded and left before he could finish.
?Blasted dwarves.?
[b:01363]
2[/b:01363]


Balor walked through the towering gatehouse of New Verden, up the passageway and eventually made it to the Village Crossroads. On instinct he turned left and saluted the wizard who seemed to never leave the crossroads.
Balor knew these lands like the back of his hands. He walked through the colourful forests that surrounded the Amita road and stopped at the city walls. A quick glance to check was anyone watching, and with the blink of an eye, he had made his way through a bush at the southern end of the city walls. He then went into the secret underground passageway that lead to behind the gates. He didn?t know much about the politics of Amita. (as an adventurer he tended to distance himself from political affiliations, he felt he was better off not to mingle with such ideologies in a realm as diverse as Wyvern.) But his father did once touch on the subject of the corrupt king. ?He hates normal folk like you and me Balor, he gave me a tough childhood he did!? he said to him the day he showed him the ancient hidden passageway built by the monks so that the poor people of Amita could escape to New Verden. It was that hidden passageway that caused Shawnee Blackhands to find a baby dwarf he would eventually name Balor? (but that?s a story for another time?)

Eventually Balor made it to the surface and into the inside of a small house. He was greeted by a young women named Ave that he recognised and who in turn recognised him. She gossiped with him for near an hour and gave him food and ale. But Balor was on business and was forced to leave but promised to stay there a night on his journey home in a few days. He thanked Ave for her kindness and bade her farewell with a gold coin of gratitude. After leaving through the front door he ended up on a grassy floor scattered with flagstones. He followed the signs to the Slums and entered the Slums District. He was welcomed with singing birds and dancing butterflies, (and a dog barking). He had a great sympathy for the people of this place. There small hole ridden cottages leaking with rain, there shops selling broken and old merchandise and there inn forced to sell cheap ale. It was a tough place to live in as his father had known. As he went north towards the Forests he heard small little footsteps patting on the large grey flagstones behind him.

He turned around to face who was running after him, it was a small young child. Dressed with soaking rags, his face barely visible with the black and brown dirt that covered it and the long scruffy hair that hung down from the top of his head.
?Spare a silver ser?? he asked politely.
Balor stared blankly at the young boy. He was as skinny as an arrow, Balor mused. Usually he would shun such peoples.. But he knew that there was a time that his father lived in the Slums District, and that he bought his family food off the money of generous travellers?. So for that reason and that reason alone, he handed the boy a hand full of gold coins, a ration of bread and a grim smile.
?Why thank you ser! That?s very kind, that is! Me Ma will be over the moon she will!?
The Dwarf didn?t answer like as usual and just carried on with his trail towards the Amita Forest.

[b:01363]3[/b:01363]


Balor loved the Amita forests. Lots of treasure to be found. He had a routine of entering the first building to the North when he entered the forest. It was a large white building infested with dungeons of kobolds, goblins and anything else a mind could possibly conjure up. He stood at the entrance of the building and braced himself. Stretched out his muscles, loosened out his neck and wielded his precious ?Cassie?. She looked thirsty. Now it was time to quench her thirst.

He barged in through the door and roared barbarically! Sweeping ?Cassie? up and down, manically dismembering and mutilating the unsuspecting goblins.
? OI! THAT?S ME LEG!!? shouted one as Balor savagely ripped the goblins leg from its joint.
They started to encircle him attempting to flank him, and overwhelm him with their numbers, but Balor was too experienced for such child?s play. Doing a 360 degree sweep of all around him leaving only headless corpses and dumbfounded heads in a large slippery pool of blood. ?HAHAHHAHA BLLOOD BLOOD!? he roared. When Balor was in public he kept his feelings bottled in?. but the battlefield was a different case. If Balors? battle cries alone didn?t scare away an opponent he would see them as worthy.

After he finished hunting down the survivors and looting there mutilated corpses, he smiled down at ?Cassie?. He could see she was thirsty no more with the blood that seeped down the blade and stock.
But he knew that her thirst was not yet fully quenched, he would have to fulfil her needs by heading down deeper into the dungeons. He walked to the top of the room and looked down mouth of the dungeon. He listened?. And listened??.. And listened? He heard screams of pain, blade hitting blade and the sadistic laughs of the victors. He smiled?????.and entered.

The minute he landed on his feet a zombie was on top of him. Clawing at him with his nails and attempting to bite him with his decayed teeth. Balor gave him a hard right hook, and successfully dislocated the creatures jaw?. It didn?t even stun him. Balor then pushed him away and got ?Cassie? in to position. He waited a second for the stupid creature to go for him again and then swung ?Cassie? through him. Cutting him literally in half with his magnificent battle axe that was ?Cassie?. The creatures decayed bone and waxy skin not taking a lot of effort to cut through.

Balor then walked through the next door to find himself surrounded by Orc?s. He stared down his prey until an arrow shot at him from the rear of the gang. He dodged it with little effort. He then went for the Orc nearest to him, slicing his stomach open with ?Cassie? he watched in joy as his bowels and internal organs splattered to the ground and then burst like balloons filled with red paint. The blood splashed over him and the late Orcs comrades. Angered by this display of murder they charged bloodletting dwarf with great velocity. Knocking him off his feet. Balor wasn?t angry by this. In fact he smiled. (Balor was always gracious in defeat. He once said in a drunken rant ? Without someone greater than you, how can one expect to improve in oneself,? he slurred as he took another sip of his strong black stout??..) The orcs took the opportunity and began to beat him on the ground, punching and kicking him in the face and body. He swung and kicked at them until he eventually made his way to a standing stature. He was starting to lose perspective of the scenario with the endless blows confusing him. So before his foes could stun him anymore he bullrushed his way out of the crazy melee to a position where he could see all his attackers. There were approximately 6 there. He decided to charge at the largest one. Defeating the leader may effect the morale of the rest. Charging him, he swung ?Cassie? up high and low again landing it directly in the centre of the creatures skull. Crushing it like a watermelon. The bits of skull flying out like needles into the faces of everyone around him. One at the back ran, Balor knew the rest would break soon. He let out one of his most bloodcurdling screams before sprinting towards the survivors. They soon scattered. But Balor being a professional hunted everyone down singularly.

After butchering what was left of that Orc pack he walked down a small hallway until he saw in the distance a small green figure. His face turned grim with the thought of it possibly being a Halfling!! But as it got closer he noticed it wasn?t. It seemed to be making something. It jumped around and let out a yelp!
?ARRGH! What the bleddy hell were ye jumping up on me for? Ya scared the bleedin life outta me!?

Balor stared confusedly.

?What?s wrong with ya? Cat got your tongue!?? It let out a giggle. It was a rather unusual creature. It looked like a very small man, with a short red beard, and a green waistcoat, a green top hat and black leather shoes. Oh, and a shamrock pinned to its jacket.

?What in the name of the gods are you?? Balor asked in a disturbed manner .
?Why I?m a leprechaun laddie!? it said proudly.
?Where do you come from? What are you doing here? Is that a bottle of whiskey!?? asked the dwarf still not impressed.
?Jeenie Macs! Whats all the questions for? I come from a different world laddie, on this small magical kingdom on an Island, we lived in tranquillity until my people were driven out by greedy men who didn?t like us! I?m here in this funny place looking for a new home?? and aye laddie, that is a bottle whiskey. T?was called Potcheen back where I come from. Would ya like a wee drop?? he asked enthusiastically.
Balor thought about this. He is so small he must be harmless, and since he mentioned free drink, Balor just couldn?t resist. He took the bottle happily and sat down beside the little creature. He took a great big gulp from the bottle. He started to relax and drift away in a daydream after a while. He looked over at the Leprechaun when he realised he was gone! This shocked Balor. Why did he go? Was he in a hurry? Why did he leave his whiskey???.. Then it hit him. He through down the bottle and his axe and searched his pockets.. He took out his coin purse and searched it till he realised. It was gone. EVERY COIN GONE!
He stood up and wobbled a bit (only then realising how strong that whiskey was) he picked up ?Cassie? (and the whiskey) and ran down the hallway. Everything was a blur, he ran around the dungeon searching frantically, not even knowing who or what he was slicing through in the meantime.
Hours and hours of searching until-

?YOU!!?
The leprechaun looked confused.
?Oh hello again there laddie?.erm?. I had to go and finish making me shoe!?arm?.uh?.?
?GIVE ME BACK MY MONEY!?
?Money? Money? Jeenie ye have me mixed for someone else laddie?ahem?.you-?

But before he could finish, Balor had already dropped his axe through his frail body. Green blood, splashing up on Balors face. After a few minutes of catching his breath and wiping the thick green blood from ?Cassie? and his armour. He searched the two halves of the leprechauns body and to his relief found all his money. He decided to call it a day and head to the Tavern. On his way out he was just about to leave the dungeon when a small green figure appeared in front of him out of thin air and ran towards him??.
He met the second leprechaun gracefully with a kiss of death from ?Cassie?. Balor hurriedly ran to the tavern before encountering another leprechaun. When he got there he ordered some ale?? but to his astonishment and horror, all his money was gone???. AGAIN!


-Balor.

Any replies/advice/crit?

[Narhalles]

lol.... A littel blood thirsty... lol


I liked the ending. a very true yet comical aproach.

Meh, better story in 23 words


Valdor takes a massive diamond sword and stabs it into a demon lord and it yells &quot;it sucks I only have fire recoil&quot;.

[Fredd]

How do yee stab somethin with a axe?

[Narhalles]

Ummm...... I give up, how?

[quote=&quot;Tegra&quot;:d2eea]
Meh, better story in 23 words


Valdor takes a massive diamond sword and stabs it into a demon lord and it yells &quot;it sucks I only have fire recoil&quot;.
[/quote:d2eea]

??

he was dissing you &gt;_&gt;

[quote=&quot;Nightswift&quot;:0e0a7]
he was dissing you &gt;_&gt;
[/quote:0e0a7]

It wasnt very constructive.

[Narhalles]

O.o now is he liar liar pants on fire with a bad attitude to boot?